


My Dumbass

by Junaxy



Series: Mean Girls/Heathers AU [1]
Category: Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe, Mean Girls the Musical, Mean girls - Fandom
Genre: Drunkveronica, F/F, F/M, its mainly jd/veronica, janis is a big gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 09:40:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20468939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Junaxy/pseuds/Junaxy
Summary: At a party where the Plastics and the Heathers decide to have a passive aggressive fight, Veronica gets drunk. JD has to deal with her bullshit.





	My Dumbass

As everyone knows at this point, JD and Veronica were an iconic duo. They did everything together. They grew up together, ate lunch together, watched JD’s mom explode and went to her funeral together. A real ride or die crew, ya feel? So, that’s why when Veronica was attending a certain party way out of JD’s comfort zone, he dragged himself along with her.

And that’s why he was standing in front of Kurt’s house.

The Remmington Party, the talk of the schoolyard. To his joy, JD had never been to this legendary party, neither Veronica. But, ever since Veronica half-assedly joined the Heathers, they got invited to way more things, including parties and raves, which JD certainly wasn’t happy about. But whatever. He went anyway, mostly because he didn’t want Veronica to drink herself to death.

Veronica was a party animal which definitely wasn’t a good thing. From memories of caring for drunk Sawyer to hearing gossip about what she ended up getting into at parties, he knew that she couldn’t handle her alcohol. But despite the various reasons she shouldn’t get hammered, she does every single time without fail. She loves it too, she gets all dressed up and everything. Well, that may just be to fit in with the rest of the Heathers, but she still was enjoying herself.

_“Suits!” Veronica had told him, cheerfully running her hand down the isle of ties. “We’re wearing color-coded suits,” _

_“Why?” JD still couldn’t believe Veronica had dragged him out to go shopping at 4 AM._

_ “Because, Jason Dean,” She picked a blue tie and lifted it to her chest. “Cady told us the plastics were dressing up so we gotta like, fight them, I guess.”_

_ JD let out a sigh and rubbed his temples, trying to act grumpy despite the fact that she looked amazing in that tie. _

She looked even better here, illuminated by the lights of Kurt’s house. Tuckered into a tight blue blazer, similar to her everyday outfit, with a black tie and a black miniskirt. It wasn’t anything too out of the ordinary, but she still rocked it. Such a Veronica thing to do.

Janis, Damian and Cady showed up five minutes later, making them all extra late. As promised, Cady wore a strapless pink dress cutting off dangerously close to her ass, while Janis and Damian sported the same chaotically colored suit they wore to last year’s prom.

Reluctantly, they all headed inside, JD needing just a tad bit more persisting from Veronica.

“Come on,” Veronica grabbed JD by the hand as they made their way up the steps. “It’ll be fun! Maybe, I mean like, I don’t know. But we’re all here together, which is fun!”

“Where’s the asshole Veronica I’m used to?” JD chuckled to himself and Veronica just smiled wider.

“I’m too excited to be a dick tonight. I’m gonna get fucking hammered,” Veronica let go of JD’s hand and dashed into the entrance door, excitement in her steps. JD let a very dramatic sigh out, lazily signed off the rest of the group with a salute and rushed after her.

“He’s such a darling,” Damian hummed to himself.

“JD? A darling?” Janis snort laughed, “Either you have a crush on him or you got drunk before we got here,”

“Ew, Janis,” Damian hissed back, recoiling. “He’s a darling for Veronica. Like you’re a darling for Cady,”

“Damn straight,” Janis shut down his friendly bullying as she reached out a hand to help Cady up the stairs. “Who wouldn’t be a darling for this little dreamgirl?”

Janis pulled Cady in for a quick peck on the cheek, and even though she tried to muster up a smile it was ever so obvious that she was nervous. Her shoulders were bunched up, her eyes were flickering around the room, and Janis’ blatant overpowering signs of affection weren’t making her laugh or even smile.

Damian and Janis stared at Cady until she finally broke.

“I-I’m sorry! Augh, just so not me tonight, y’know?” Cady let out a shaky laugh, scratching the back of her neck. “Parties aren’t my thing, and the Heathers are going to be there and I’m not gonna even be able to hang out with you guys!”

Janis looked at Cady for a second, as if she was studying her features, before lifting up her chin to make eye contact. “Cady, you’ve been attacked by a _fucking lion_. If anyone can handle Regina or the Heathers, It’s gonna be you,” Janis ruffled her hair with a lovesick chuckle, “you go get em’ tiger.”

Cady stepped back and cocked an eyebrow at Janis. “What are you, my dad?”

The three shared a laugh as Janis mustered up the manliest voice possible, “You go get them champ!” while of course voice cracking.

Cady smiled to herself, adjusted Janis’ bowtie and kissed her goodbye before stepping into the chaos party pit. Damian snorted to himself as Janis looked after her like a typical lovestruck cartoon character.

“You’re such a sap,” Damian shook his head as he guided Janis inside. “And the party is missing two amazing gays, so keep your monkey lesbian brain off Cady for one second and let’s party!”

“You challenge me to do the impossible,” Janis smirked to herself.

“Party?”

“Keep my mind off Cady,”

“Fucker.”

\---

An hour in and it was already hell. scratch that, maybe worse than hell. Imagine:

You’re 6’3 among a sea of shortlings, and you’re the only one who isn’t in anything remotely fancy. In fact, you’re wearing a trenchcoat. If that doesn’t make it bad enough, you’ve been told you give off the school shooter vibe, so the trenchcoat really isn’t helping. The cherry on top? You’re following around a drunk Veronica, who’s running around the party flirting with guys and taking shot after shot.

JD had just finally managed to find Veronica attempting to convince some girl to share her weed after searching for a panicky five minutes. He grabbed her by the shoulders and basically dragged her to the porch, despite her grumbling the whole way.

“What?” Veronica groaned as she tried to break free from JD’s iron grasp. “I’m fine! See, not even slurring’!”

“That doesn’t change the fact you’ve had six shots in an hour,” JD spoke in the most ‘I’m fucking done with you’ voice as he sat Veronica down on the swinging bench. Veronica swung her head over to him, swaying a little bit as she tried way too hard to focus on the red solo cup in his hand.

“You motherfucking hypocrite!” Veronica theatrically pointed to JD’s cup as if it was some sort of secret. JD tilted his head at her. “You, you come here and drink and call me a drunk? Shame on thee,”

“I’m having a couple sips of beer, Sawyer,” JD set his cup down. “And I’m not the one who’s swaying like a branch.”

“Where?” Veronica glanced around the empty porch, before realizing the special swayer was Sawyer and shooting a dirty look back at JD. “I’m barely swaying.”

“Mhm,” JD smiled to himself and took another sip of beer. He wasn’t big on alcohol like Veronica was, it reminded him too much of his father. In fact, this whole party just ranked of his father. He always smelled like whiskey or vodka or just any sort of alcohol. Which was probably more of a blessing than a curse, to be fair. Getting as shitfaced as Veronica didn’t seem to be his forte. Speaking of Veronica, while JD was deep in thought about his daddy issues, Veronica had managed to sway her way back into the party. JD glanced around, did the ‘boi’ meme with his hands before dragging himself back into the hellscape because the babysitter has lost his baby.

\---

Ten minutes later of deja vu-like panic, JD had found Veronica. Well, not exactly found. He had heard Veronica yelling in the middle of the dance floor.

_Jesus Christ_.

He weaved himself through the crowd, praying to his nonexistent God that she wasn’t stripping or just all around being an idiot. Luckily, she wasn’t doing anything stupid. Yet.

“Listen up y'all!” Veronica called to the crowd, thank the Lord know one really cared, including her. “The reason you should vote for Heathers, 1989, is-”

Veronica trailed off into a noncoherent jumble of reasons for why the Heathers should be… president? I don’t know. Anyway, JD finally made his way to the front of the crowd, where he saw Veronica swaying a lot more than before. Maybe the alcohol really kicked in or maybe she got another shot, an unsolvable mystery. Her left sock had presumably rolled down on its own, one of the buttons on her blazer had come undone, and her tie was irritatingly messy. She was flailing her arms in the air like she just don’t care.

The best part about it? She was exactly in between the Heathers and the Plastics. Cady was watching with the largest eyes humanly possible, the Plastics were all looking at her a bit dumbfounded, and Heather Chandler had made furious eye contact with him while heavily gesturing towards Veronica.

“Get her away,” Heather Chandler mouthed at him with an embarrassed red cheeks. Obviously, drunk Veronica wasn’t a good look for the Heathers. JD replied with a curt nod.

Before he could slyly get Veronica away without making too much of a scene, she approached Regina with drunk confidence. Veronica looked around the room, smiled to herself, and then lifted her head to make eye contact with the pink queen.

“Listen here, bucko,” Veronica slurred and stumbled backwards. The crowd around them began to quiet, obviously here for the drama that was about to go down. JD nervously dug his fingers into his sleeve as he watched helplessly, hoping, praying, so close to converting to Christianity just so Veronica wouldn’t fuck everything up.

Well, hopings for suckers then, because of course Veronica fucked everything up.

“Here… uh.., wait,” Veronica put a hand to her forehead, scratching her scalp, before flicking her head back up. “Yeah! Y’know what, Regina?”

“What-” Regina was cut off by Veronica putting a loose finger to her lips.

“Y’know what? You’re never gonna win this war, Regina,” She ickily dragged on her name with a wideass smile which didn’t calm JD’s nerves one bit. “Why? Well, It’s because you don’t have Veronica fucking Sawyer on your side, that’s why,” Veronica grinned to herself and lifted the finger from her lips to boop her nose.

And that’s when she threw up on her shoes.

Chaos broke loose immediately. Cady, Gretchen and Karen all recoiled backwards with the same astounded expression. Janis and Damian watched from the sidelines, Janis cackling and Damian with an ‘oh no’ expression. The Heathers all snickered among themselves. The crowd among them broke into various chants of “Catfight!” and “Veronica! Veronica!” Veronica swayed, holding onto her stomach and eyes to the floor while Regina stood above her, letting out a blood curdling screech and lifting her hands to beat Veronica senseless. That’s when JD sprinted onto the floor.

JD grabbed Veronica, basically lifting her off her feet right as Regina brought her hand down. The two missed by nearly an inch, so close that he felt the wind go by. He didn’t stop though. He didn’t look to see how anyone was reacting. He didn’t turn around to see the fights break out. He just coddled up Veronica in his trenchcoat and basically pushed his way to the door quarterback style.

“Don’t push me around,” Veronica moaned as JD settled her down right outside of their car. She leaned over the fender and clenched onto her stomach. “I’ll throw up on your shoes,”

“You should be thanking me!” JD spat as he leaned against the car door. “You would’ve got your ass kicked in there,”

Veronica didn’t respond the way JD hoped she would. In fact, she didn’t respond at all. She just leaned over the car, gagging and furrowing her eyebrows. JD couldn’t help but feel guilty for yelling, even though Veronica was being a dumbass.

_But she’s my dumbass_, JD sighed to himself as he made his way over to her. He gingerly placed a hand on her back and started patting her, trying to ignore the gargole noises she made as she puked her guts out. _And I gotta take care of her_.

\---

_This is the best thing that could’ve happened_.

Janis was cheering like a madman the whole time. Through Veronica drunkenly campaigning everyone, through her giving the best one liner in history, and of course through Regina puking on her shoes. Regina may be giving her a break on the whole “space dyke” thing, but that still didn’t mean every drop of blood in her body didn’t want to watch her suffer.

But then things went unexpectedly. She definitely didn’t expect Regina to attempt to hit Veronica, especially with her weakass arms. So thank God for JD, but also not, because as soon as Veronica was gone Regina went after the closest Heather in proximity: Heather Chandler. Regina basically launched herself at Heather Chandler and they both hit the floor with a crashing thud. The other two Heathers, which she had colorfully nicknamed as “Green Heather” and “Yellow Heather” immediately jumped in to save their red highness. But, to their defense, Gretchen also rushed to Regina’s aid, while Cady tried to break up the fight. Karen just stood there and stared, probably having no clue about the situation.

It was when Green Heather had taken off her high heels and started to corner Cady that she stopped cheering. She ran into the little clearing the chanting crowd had made, despite Damian trying to hold her back, and threw herself in front of Cady. Half on instinct and half on wanting to impress her lovely girlfriend, she punched Green Heather in the stomach and took no time to gloat in the fact she literally collapsed to the floor. She grabbed Cady by the hand, signaled Damian to follow them and worked their way through the crowd.

Welcomed by the crisp air of the night, Janis let out a holler and ran a hand through her sweaty hair. “Jesus! That was… wow. That was a game changer.”

“There is literally a war waging in there and those are your choice of words?” Damian said with a sassy, sophisticated tone, before dropping the act once he saw Veronica. She was leaning over the car, throwing up, while JD awkwardly comforted her. “Awh, baby!”

While Damian ran to the damsel in distress flailing his arms, Janis turned to Cady. She grabbed on of her freckled hands and flashed her a smile.

“Are you okay?” Janis tried to avoid her asshole deminoar for once in her life and adapted a softer tone. Cady looked down at both of their hands intertwined, and then smiled at her.

“I’m tits,” Cady’s grin grew wider until she burst out into a bit of laughter. Janis, at first, stepped back, astounded that Cady would ever use the language of her likes. But Cady’s laugh was just so contagious she couldn’t help but laugh too.

\---

“What’s so funny?” Veronica grumbled between fits of vomitting. JD glanced over at the two lesbians having a gay old time, and proceeded to shrug his shoulders.

“Darling, don’t you worry your little head about such a thing,” Damian cooed and squeezed her hand. “Are you good to drive anytime soon?”

Veronica pushed herself up with the help of the car and tried to keep balance, despite the fact that her world was a little tilted. You would’ve thought with all that vomiting she’d sober up, but maybe that last shot of Vodka lime was still in her. But nevertheless, Veronica’s a trooper, and no booze is gonna keep her from living her best life.

“I’m..,” Veronica clutched onto the car. “I’m good. I’m great.”

“You sure look great,” JD grinned and flashed a cocky smile at her. Veronica mustered up a smirk through her daze.

“I always look great, no need to remind me,” She giggled to herself, before she immediately knelt down as she felt more bile rising in her throat. But, after a very hard swallow, she pushed it down and stood victorious once more. “I’m good to drive.” Veronica said in the best ‘I’m not drunk’ voice she could offer, only to receive two doubting looks from Damian and JD. “I’ll lean out the window, just in case,”

“Alright,” JD held out an arm for Veronica to grab onto as she limped her way to the car. “Is Janis or Cady good to drive, or is it on me?”

“I wouldn’t know, honestly. Janis can handle her alcohol really well and I don’t know what the Plastics are putting my baby through,” Damian turned to Janis and Cady, who were still cackling over God knows what. “Speaking of, get over here lesbians!”

As the three gays made their way into the back seat, JD helped Veronica into the front seat.

“There we go, one leg at a time,” JD cooed in a teasing tone, grinning way too much at his own joke. “Yeah, you got it.”

As Veronica settled into the passenger seat, she shot JD a salty look. JD just closed the door, smirking, and leaned his head in through the open window. “Do I get any tips, ma’am?” JD snickered.

“Asshole,” Veronica hissed with a smile as she leaned out the window. “Begone before I ruin thou trench coat.”

“Oh no,” JD chuckled as he made his way to the driver's seat.

The drive there was luckily peaceful, with Janis gushing about how Regina’s dress was ruined and Veronica only puking once out the window.

Being them and being stupid young teenagers, they decided to drop by 7/11. JD had already decided for their sake that he was taking them over to crash at his house, purely so their parents don’t roast them alive. And what’s a hangover party without snacks?

Damian and Cady were really the ones who got the snacks. Janis and Veronica wondered throughout the card isles and talked about how weirdly similar their voices were, while JD got himself a blueberry slushie. They walked out and no one died, so that’s good.

It was around 2 in the morning when JD managed to sneak in everyone through his window. Short of a miracle, really. Veronica almost fell, twice, and Janis was being so loud he was sure his dad would’ve caught him. But he was probably facedown on their living room floor, sleeping his buzz off.

_No, nope_, JD cursed at himself as he set down the snacks on the table. _We’re not doing that. You’ve got the best people in the world chilling in your bedroom, and you’re not gonna think of your bastard of a father._

Cady set up a little blanket nest for her and Janis, while Damian leaned on the wall, feasting upon barbecue lays. Veronica just straight up plopped herself in JD’s bed, barely alive. JD settled down next to her. Only fair, since it was his own bed, but whatever.

An hour passed and people started to drop like flies. Surprisingly, Janis was the one to go first. She fell asleep with her head in Cady’s lap as she stroked her hair, talking about lions and Africa and how her first crush literally ran away from her. Cady followed suite and curled up next to Janis, then Damian, who claimed that JD wasn’t interesting enough to talk to because he hadn’t shot a lion. So it was just him and Veronica, Veronica and him, the iconic duo.

“You still feeling like throwing up?” JD evilily grinned to himself, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Because an unsuspecting Damian is feet away from you.”

“If I’m gonna puke anymore I’m gonna puke directly on you,” Veronica retorted, burying herself in JD’s sheets.

“I save you from being whacked by Regina, I help you into the car, you steal my bed, and this is how I’m repaid?”

“Damn right,” Veronica snickered and propped herself up with her elbows, untying her tie. “You could repay me, though,”

Seeing as Veronica was stripping down to hopefully just her shirt, he couldn’t help but blush when she asked that question. It didn’t help when his confidence wavered enough for his voice to crack. “Like what?”

Veronica chucked her blue blazer to the side and plopped backwards into his bed. “You could tuck me in.”

JD paused for a moment to second glance at her. “Are you shitting me?”

She responded with a consortium of giggles and snorts. JD sighed, amused with her tomfuckery, and carefully made his way over to the cabnients, careful to not awake Mr. Gay and Ms. I Shot a Lion.

He shedded his trenchcoat and tossed it to the floor, before grabbing one of the blankets from the cabinet. Tiptoeing his way back, he could see Veronica’s excited face through the dim moonlight casting through his window. Midway through his dramatic sigh, he could help but laugh.

“What are you, five?” JD mumbled as he placed the blanket over Veronica gingerly. Veronica giggled to herself, suppressing her chortles, and nodded her head ecstatically.

JD unconsciously smiled to himself as he grabbed a pillow from the floor, nudging it under Veronica’s head. JD stood a little taller to admire his work.

“How’s that, princess?” JD purred in a simper tone. Veronica looked up at him with such a devilish gleam he could help but feel his gut twist a little.

“Needs a finishing touch,” Veronica raised a hand up from under the blankets and pointed to her forehead. JD looked down at her puzzled. If she was actually…

“Kiss on the forehead?” Veronica grinned a chaotic bastard grin, mainly at the expression on JD’s face. It was sort of horror, sort of surprise, a fine line between the two. But Veronica just kept pointing at her forehead with the same look. So, he bent down and planted a short but sweet kiss on her forehead.

“B-better?” JD couldn’t help but laugh and cringe at how much confidence his voice lost. Veronica didn’t seem to mind though. She snuggled down deeper into the blanket.

“Much,” She mumbled, her voice sleepy.

JD just let himself stand up, look around the room, and wonder what the fuck just happened. He had so many questions with such a lack of answers. Did she stay up to do that? Was she waiting for the rest of them to go to sleep? Why did she do that? Why did he tuck her in? Why did she ask him for a _fucking goodnight’s kiss_?

She had done this before, on multiple occasions. Most memorable when they were 14 and she just casually no homo spooned him while they fell asleep. She just seems to lose all of her social fears or biases and adapts this cocky, top attitude. Did JD like it? Yes, of course, very much so. But it still made it all so confusing and left him pondering with the biggest question of all: did Veronica Sawyer have feelings for him or not?

JD looked back down at Veronica. She had dozed off, snoring suddenly in between deep breaths. It’s like how she always slept. Loudly, like she was all the time, being a dumbass and stating her opinions everywhere she went.

_ But she’s my dumbass_, JD smiled to himself.

And then he remembered he had to sleep in the same bed.

_ Fuck_.

\---

They all woke up around 12 groaning and wishing they didn’t. Veronica being the loudest. Luckily, JD had woken up a little bit earlier than everyone, which gave him enough time to realize that he had wrapped his arms around Veronica in his sleep. He immediately yanked his arm away in his embarrassment, which unluckily prompted Veronica to wake up, which then prompted everyone else to wake up due to her complaining.

“Jesus Christ,” Veronica furrowed her eyebrows and burrowed herself into the blankets. “Why is the sky so blue?”

“Jesus Christ, why are you so loud?” Janis mumbled, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. Cady was laying face-first against the floor, one hand on Janis’ and one covering her head.

“Janis, why do you have to be a nasty gay,” Damian looked up from spooning his pillow. “Why can’t you be a nice gay, like Cady?”

“Why do you have to be so fucking extra-” Janis hissed with poison in her eyes before Cady pulled her down into a headlock hug.

“Let’s not fight,” Cady mumbled into Janis’ hair. “Because I will literally shoot you all.”

“Do y'all have a hangover?” Veronica grumbled, muffled inside the blankets.

“Mhm,” The three gays mumbled in unison and JD shot Cady a questioning look.

“You drink, Africa?”

“Not usually,” Cady looked up, rubbing her temples. “But Regina wanted me too, and I’m not arguing with her,”

Janis growled under her breath. “Fuckin’ bitch.”

Veronica suddenly sat up in bed, her eyes wide as saucers. “Oh my God, I puked on Regina last night, didn’t I?” Before immediately collapsing back down with a groan. Janis dryly chuckled to herself while Damian nodded. God, wasn’t this a happy group?

“Welp,” JD slapped his hands together, hopping out of bed. It felt great to be the only one out of your friends to not have a hangover. Like, really great. Better than it should have. “I’ll whip up some prairie oysters and then you all should head home before your parents butcher me,”

Janis froze, mumbled “motherfucker” under her breath and then leaned further into Cady.

It was a quiet ten minutes before JD returned with four prairie oysters. Veronica downed it in a second, desperate to get rid of her hangover, while Damian and Janis took a while to get theirs down. Cady, who was too shy to ask what was in a prairie oyster, was a little bit surprised. But, she’s eaten the scorpian inside those lollipops so it wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

Damian was the first to leave, being in a sour mood and unable to handle Janis’ jackass personality. Cady and Janis left shortly after, probably to go make out in a closet somewhere. Back to the iconic duo once more! Yay fanfiction!

JD was sitting on his bed, back leaning against the walls as he chewed on his fingernails. Veronica was still in bed burying her face in the blankets. Veronica popped her head up suddenly, her hair ruffled, her makeup smeared and overall looking disheveled. “What did I do last night?”

JD looked up from his nibbling. “That’s a difficult question,”

Veronica fell back onto the bed, facing the ceiling. “I can remember some things. I remember puking on Regina,” She grinned to herself. “And I remember talking with Janis in 7/11. You had a slushie!”

“Of course,” JD hummed, looking back at his fingernails. “I also saved your life.”

Veronica snorted. “How so?”

“Well, you know you,” JD gestured to her. “Drunk off your ass. Anyway, so you gave this speech about how Regina was going to lose because you weren’t on her side, and you puked on her! She tried to slap you but being me, I courageously dragged you out the door,”

“Heh,” Veronica wrapped her arms over her torso. “Sounds like something you’d do. And it definitely sounds like something I’d do,”

Veronica stared up at the ceiling with a blank look in her eyes and JD tried to find any sort of regret or embarrassment in her expression. Did she remember? She must. She was pretty sober at point, or at least she seemed so… Well, there’s only one way to call out the elephant in the room, isn’t there? “So…” JD rubbed the back of his neck, looking in any direction that wasn’t Veronica’s. “Do you remember the whole goodnight kiss thing?”

The sound of Veronica jumping up from the bed was enough of an answer for JD. His gut twisted and he turned to face her with scared eyes.

_ Please don’t let this be the one mistake I make to lose her_.

“The whole what?” Veronica climbed over to make more direct eye contact with JD, which honestly wasn’t necessary.

“Well, uhm..,” He looked for the words to phrase it right so it didn’t sound like a complete and utter lie. “You asked me if uh… I could tuck you in? And I’m a sucker so I did so. And you asked for a goodnight kiss on the forehead…” JD paused and looked up at Veronica. She was staring back at him with the same wide puppy eyes, and gestured for him to continue. “...And I did…”

They stared at each other for a solid five seconds, noses inches away from each other. If it was a movie scene, they would’ve started making out. But this is reality, and it’s a lot more messy.

“Ha!” Veronica sat back and pointed a finger at him. “That’s so embarrassing!”

“What?” JD tried not to sound defeated, but his confidence was dripping through the cracks.

“You had to kiss someone like me!” Veronica chortled to herself and JD couldn’t help but be so relieved and so confused at the same time.

“What do you mean someone like you?” JD was starting to gain more of his sarcastic asshole confidence with each word.

“You had to kiss this dumbass!” Veronica snorted through breathless laughs and wheezing.

_ My dumbass_.

“You’re no dumbass,” JD was starting to laugh alongside her.

“Ahhh,” Veronica leaned backwards, finally catching her breath. “So you enjoyed it, I see?”

“Alright, I retract my statement,” JD hopped up from his bed, picking up Veronica’s blazer from the floor. He tossed it to her. “You are a dumbass.”

“Aww!” Veronica looked up at him with a teasing dejected look. “You’re so lame.”

“And you’re so in trouble and I don’t want to die in your place,” JD smiled as he lifted up his trenchcoat.

They both got situated the best they could, even though Veronica’s smeared makeup and hair would need a lot more than whatever JD could offer. He walked her to the door, giving her a pack of gummies for the trouble, and leaned against the doorframe as she walked out.

“Wait! Wait,” Veronica paused and jumped halfway through his yard. She jumped back in front of JD, and pointed to her forehead. 

“...You can’t be serious.”

“Pucker up, bitchboy,” Veronica snickered to herself and JD let out a sigh.

“Why are you like this?”

“Because it’s funny,” Veronica pointed once more. “Get on with it before my parents call the police.”

JD did his best to hide his smile, bent down and planted a motherly kiss upon her forehead. She brightened, maybe with amusement or maybe with something else, and made her way down the sidewalk.

“Bye, _Jason Dean_!” Veronica called in a sarcastic tone, waving her hand furiously.

“Farewell, dumbass!” JD yelled back, mocking her with the same furious hand wave. As she crossed the street, he couldn’t help but chuckle to himself. “My dumbass.”

**Author's Note:**

> did you enjoy? im a sucker for heathers/mean girls crossovers


End file.
